Epic Vacation -- with details

Here is a summary of what I did:

1) Mom arrives in Sussundenga, day-trip to Mount Zembe.
After talking to the Chefe of the Administrative Post, driving to the Queen of Zembe's house and picking up her and her sister, then participating in a ceremony to appease the spirits of Mount Zembe, we were able to climb the mountain.

2) Rio Sevani, Vonnie and my b-day.
After buying several flats of beer and a bunch of food we headed to the closest beach in our region, Rio Sevani. We were all done with classes at this point, so many of us were glad to sit on a beach, drink a beer or many, and unwind. One night after drinking a bit my friends came into my parent's bungalow and met them for the first time. I walked outside with my mom who turns to me and says "this would be a good sobriety test!"

3) Go to Gorongosa park with the parents.
My Mom, George, and I spent two nights in Gorongosa National park, one of the few places that still has wildlife in Mozambique after the civil war. Many of the animals were killed by hungry soldiers. Some of the elephants were alive during the war and are now terrified by humans. The biodiversity is low, however the population of some species (waterbuck, impala, warthog, and baboon) is bouncing back quickly.

4) Pick up Andrew, stay at Barra for two nights, Ocean Safari swim with whale-shark.
Barra is a great place to stay if you're not tight on money. We went on an "ocean safari" which means you drive around in a boat with snorkel and fins on waiting to see some animal in the water. The guides are pretty good at spotting them, and this time we were able to see a whale shark (largest fish in the world, this one was about 15 ft long) and swam next to it for a good while as it lazily fed on plankton. I can check the achievement off the list of "things to do before I die", however I'm still eager to swim with an even larger one...

5) Drop off Andrew at Jon's site, spend two nights in Kruger Park with my parents.
Spent two nights in Kruger with the rents. Kruger National Park in South Africa is the best park around and I highly recommend it. It has pretty much everything - from crocodile to wild dog, as well as the Big 5. We managed to see 4 of them: elephant, lion, rhino, and cape buffalo, but not leopard.

6) I part with my parents, spend one strange night in Maputo with some expats I meet.
Anyone alone in Maputo should get a room at Fatima's backpackers place. You can instantly find some interesting people to talk to.

7) I meet Jon and we go to Tofo for one night and cut a rug at a discoteca.
We also went to a super nice hotel in Barra called Flamingo Bay and had lunch there / swam in the pool. It makes me want to get married just so I can have my honeymoon there. Before hittin the dance floor Jon and I also talked about a plethora of topics, from the complex race issues in South Africa to female anatomy.

8) Jon and I return to his site. We drink lots of soura (coconut wine) and watch Star Wars.
OoO-tee-Nee!

9) Jon and I meet Mike in Maxixe, head south to Scooter and Ann's site.

10) We all head to Bilene, close to Xai-Xai, for the trainees' “site visit”. It was more partying than anything else.
The moz 15ers actually wanted to have more of a mellow weekend, I found out later. It was a strange way to meet the new volunteers (us trying to get everyone buck-wild), but I'm sure I made a good impression.

11) I go to the last week of training for the new volunteers. Work hard and play hard.
I was glad to help out in training as an Education volunteer with Vonnie, Sam, and Gabe. We managed not to screw up the diversity session (or the "Identity Formation" session, as we called it).

12) Spend a couple nights in Maputo and appreciate great food, music videos, and the hilarious family of a man who works for USAID.

13) Sam, Vonnie, Mike, and I go to Ponta do Ouro for some nar shredding, rockin out, and braying.
In English that would be surfing (I stood up!), dancing, and grilling. Ponto do Ouro is like South Africa's Nogales (it's in Mexico) and there were a lot of South African college students who were there on holiday. I also learned how to say "ice" if you are from South Africa (it really sounds like "ass" and I had to ask about 10 times).

14) I fly to Nampula, in the north. I spend a nervous night at a hotel waiting for seven of my friends who were on a bus from Beira. They end up spending the night on the road which made their bus-trip a total of 26 hours.
I got in a huge argument with the guy at the front desk when I found out my friends weren't coming and he wanted me to pay for all three rooms I had reserved. In my broken Portuguese, I say some things that I probably shouldn't have.

15) We all go to Mozambique Island for Brian's birthday party. We “roast” him on the night of his birthday which means we make him sit in a stool in front of everyone else and make fun of him until he cries like a baby.
That pretty much explains it.

16) Vonnie, Brennan and I return to central region. We barely make it when we get chased out of a small town by the residents holding pitchforks and torches (kidding!).
But we did get kicked out of a restaurant for refusing to pay 150 MTs for a plate of eggs, potatoes, and lettuce. I mean, come on, that's just ridiculous!